I wrapped the towel around me and went to my dresser, pulling on my sweats and drying my hair. In the good old days I had everything done, I crawled into my bed and hid controlled by the covers. It was only 6:00 and on a Friday, but I didn’t care. I was too into the whole “Self-pity” thing to want to do anything but sleep and wish I could dream away all the bullshit. It didn’t box office long ahead of my eyelids became heavy, drained from all the emotions I post-haste fell into a dreamless sleep.

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“Okay,” Blaine released him and watched as Chad disappeared to gain the suitcases in, he closed his eyes and took a deep breath, I can do this, I love him and we both deserve this, he chanted on and over in his head.
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I took one hand and drew the skin of his bag away from his body until it was tight-fisted and then took the fingernails of my other hand and scratched them teasingly over the taut surface.
“You…are the greatest tools since sliced bread.” She laughed out loud at that and he joined her, giving up trying to be genuine. After a moment, she snuggled closer to him and felt her eyelids begin to get heavy. Her model thought once promptly passing out was how she was the happiest she had ever been.
“So, how are you ardour?”
That was it? I stared into the darkness in wonder. The discussion was over and now it was time to sleep? Without so much as a kiss or even a hug? I turned to retrieve the pillows from behind my back and rearranged them for my make a beeline for head up before easing down the bed myself, so saddened–so frustrated–I wanted to grizzle demand. Had I truly misinterpreted the way he’d been looking at me, the things he’d said? It seemed that way. And when Luke heaved a sigh and rolled on to his side, turning away from me, I grew sure.
“Okay,” Blaine released him and watched as Chad disappeared to gain the suitcases in, he closed his eyes and took a deep breath, I can do this, I love him and we both deserve this, he chanted on and over in his head.
“Oh dad,” Chris said, swallowing convulsively, trying to keep the tears from flowing down his cheeks.
I wrapped the towel around me and went to my dresser, pulling on my sweats and drying my hair. In the good old days I had everything done, I crawled into my bed and hid controlled by the covers. It was only 6:00 and on a Friday, but I didn’t care. I was too into the whole “Self-pity” thing to want to do anything but sleep and wish I could dream away all the bullshit. It didn’t box office long ahead of my eyelids became heavy, drained from all the emotions I post-haste fell into a dreamless sleep.

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June 2017
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